Tale of the Tape (One min. Next Min.)

This is the Tale of the Tape of the Heart.

One min. I wanna be alone. Next, I wanna be with her.

One min.:

It's not right 4 us to be together.
We're too opposite.
She's not ready.
Maybe I'm not ready.
We always fight.
We always hurt.
We're killing each other.

Next Min.:

Nothin' wrong about us being together.
We're one in the same.
She's been built for this.
So have I.
We make up just as quick.
We always heal.
We keep each other alive.

One min.:
I hurt her too much to go back.
Maybe so much so that she's grown tired.
Maybe there's somebody else.
Maybe I honestly blew it this time.

Next min.:
I can fix her hurt, so I can go back.
She said she loved me.
Nobody else but me.
Maybe I there's hope for me after all.


I'm conflicted inside.
Can't choose. It's too delicate.

Damn you "Time". You never make shit easy.

One min. Next min.

The prelude.......

So before I begin to introduce this blog....

I'd like to say a few words.

They love it when you make your business public. SO FUCK IT!

I am now officially a single man. Why? Because of quotes like this.

"Rahel Says if I wasnt on fb mobile i'd dump u. u non communicating lyin ass nigga. single like kraft cheese. TOO OFFICIAL!" ".....get tht one str8 b4 u do anything. fuck u lil' boy. grow up and thn come see me. u wonder y no one takes u seriously? cuz the sob stories r gettin old. do sumthin useful wit urself nd u talent plz." and various other quotes I won't get into.

But let me take you back to the beginning. Around july or june, I was caught cheating with another woman. Yes, I did the dummy. But since then, I've not only apologized, I've become a better person as far as relationships go. But during that process, trust is lost, questions are asked, and people talk. With all of these factors comes the fights, and the arguements. Now, we're grown. Allegedly. So we talk it out and problems are solved...until those same problems come up again. 'Til one day, I was dumped. And honestly, I saw it coming. Not gonna lie. Just didn't see it happening over facebook. (For those who don't know, Facebook is a website designed for students of any class and employers/employees to connect and network.) Yes, I was DUMPED ONLINE! 

So I left her alone. But we're friends (I'm assuming) regardless, with deep, deep feelings for one another, so it was never any difference. After an altercation with a female trying to get @ me and it didn't work.....we got back together. Now it seems we've broken up again.

Reason being: I didn't call her. And I wasn't answering my phone when she did. Why you ask? My phone died.  Why did I not find another phone? Honestly, I was being productive and didn't wanna be bothered til' later. Now, I'm in the wrong, I'll admit. But it's not like I won't get back to you and it won't be that long. But I receive an email stating that "until I learn the art of communication, don't call her". .......So I didn't. And I won't. Because a person's word is their bond. I take nothing lightly.

Only to later find up on the same email website, she's been apparently "single like Kraft Cheese, TOO OFFICIAL!". (In case you're wondering the significance of this phrase, she's basically claiming she don't need a man and feeling good about her self because she's fine and this and that and blah blah blah blah!) So don't leave me to stop you from being ms. independent. I'mma leave you alone. And if you single, hell, what does that leave me? I ain't exactly dating 4 two by myself ya know? 

I know this sounds messed up to say. Because there were deeper feelings. I did actually see myself marrying her one day. But looking @ it now, and how she is....there's too much I can't deal with that she needs to work out on her own. The fact that you would go as far as to put your personal business about me out there for the internet. I mean, every emotion she feels, it's at least one facebook status change every 5 mins. And since that fateful june/july period, I haven't cheated since. I been str8 up and all about her. Not like I don't care and I don't wanna be with her. But she's too much of a loose cannon. She can be an asshole, obnoxious, loud and inconsiderate. Worse part is, this is her more calmed down since high school. That's not good. She shares business about her and us out there that don't need to be. She's too defensive with everything. She's impulsive as fuck. I can only put up with so much, which is why sometimes I don't pick up my phone to get away from it all. But when I do, I'm guilty for wantin' to be by myself sometimes.

And everytime we'd fight. Shit would happen like blocking my email profiles and untagging me from pics with me and her, you know...dumb shit. Always pickin' fights...it's like DAMN calm da fuck down. I wouldn't mind staying with her...but when you say shit like you single like kraft cheese....you ain't sayin' it for nothin'! So i'mma let you live ya words....all cause i just wanna be alone 4 a sec.

Now watch she reads this and get to talkin' to her peoples about it. Prolly get to tryna treat me on some other shit. No matter tho.....I'mma keep doing what I've been doin'. tryna get on my shit. and Stay on my shit. So I'm not mad. Never was. Never wanted to end it. But when you push my buttons, reprecussions occur. Sorry. 

Signing out....

Anthony Diangelo Ingram Jr.